Читать книгу: «The Mirror of Literature, Amusement, and Instruction. Volume 10, No. 280, October 27, 1827», страница 7

THE GATHERER

"I am but a Gatherer and disposer of other men's stuff."—Wotton.

TO CHLOE, AT SIXTY

 
Those teeth, as white as orient pearls
Stolen from th' Indian deep,
Those locks, whose light and auburn curls
Soft on thy shoulders sleep,
Expose a woman to the sight
None but old friends can know;
Thy locks were grey, thy teeth not white,
Some twenty years ago.
 

Wilkes used to say, that a gentleman did not always require a footman to carry a parcel, for there were three things which he might always carry openly in his hand,—a book, a paper of snuff, and a string of fish.

HEREDITARY TALENT IN ACTORS

"Families are chequered as in brains, so in bulk."—FULLER.

The children of many obscure performers have become eminent: but there are very few instances in which the descendant of a considerable actor or actress has been distinguished. To take instances within recent recollection, or of the present day, for example—Mr. Elliston has a son upon the stage: with none of the striking talent of the father. Mr. Henry Siddons, the son of Mrs. Siddons, was a very bad actor indeed. Lewis had two sons upon the stage, neither of them of any value. Mr. Dowton has two sons (or had), in the same situation. And Mrs. Glover's two daughters will never rise above mediocrity. On the other hand, Mr. Macready and Mr. Wallack, are both sons of very low actors; and the late Mr. John Bannister and Mr. Tokely were similarly descended. Almost the only modern instance of the immediate descendant of a valuable performer turning out well, was in the case of Mrs. Jordan's daughter, Mrs. Alsop; who was very nearly as good an actress as her mother. We doubt, too, if there is an instance on record of a very young man being a considerable actor.

PRISON TORTURE

A horrible instance of human vengeance occurred a short time since, at Minden, in Westphalia. The object was a person who, from conscientious motives, peculiar to the religious body of which he was a member, had refused to serve in the militia. He was placed in a cell, the floor and sides of which were closely studded with projecting spikes, or pieces of sharpened iron resembling the blades of knives. The individual remained in this state for twenty-four hours, and the punishment was repeated at three distinct intervals. It is considered a rare occurrence for a person to survive the second infliction of this species of cruelty. In this instance, however, the sufferer did not perish—From the last Report of the Prison Discipline Society.

THE DUCHESS OF DEVONSHIRE

As her Grace was one day rambling in the neighbourhood of Chiswick, she was overtaken by a violent storm, and accordingly took shelter, in a cottage where she happened to be unknown. Among other topics she introduced with her usual affability, she asked the poor woman if she knew the Duchess of Devonshire? "Know her, (answered the woman,) everybody has cause to know her here; never was there a better lady born." "I am afraid you are mistaken, (said her Grace); from what I understand of her, she is no better than she should be." "I am sure you are no better than you should be, (returned the poor woman,) to find fault with the Duchess; but you'll never be worthy to wipe her shoes." "Well then, (rejoined her Grace,) I must be beholden to you, as they are at present very dirty." The good woman perceiving the awkward mistake, ran to perform the office with great humility, and received an ample reward.

KITCHEN CONUNDRUM

 
"Come Thomas," says Kitty, "pray make us a pun,—
You're goodnatured and never refuse;"
 
 
"Ask coachee," says Tom, "he's the fellow for Fun,—
For he knows the way to a-mews."
 
 
Says coachee, "Why Thomas you puzzle my brains,
For you never can bridle your wit;"
 
 
"But how comes it, that I, tho' exposed to the reins
Ev'ry day, never suffer a bit?"
 

DEAR TIMES

After the union with Ireland, when the Irish members had taken their seats, one of them, in the heat of his maiden speech, blustered out, "Now, dare Mr. Speaker," which, of course, set the house in an immoderate fit of laughter. When the tumult had subsided, Sheridan observed, "that the honourable gentleman was perfectly in order, since, thanks to the ministry, everything at that time was immoderately dear."