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В легкой занимательной форме, с мягким юмором здесь говорится обо всех этих серьезных проблемах, причинах их возникновения и возможных путях решения.

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Не ожидала от этой книги чего-то особенного...А зря...Книгу можно растащить на цитаты...Мне очень понравилось. \n

Ответ прост – у женщины, которая относится к себе с должным уважением, гораздо меньше шансов связаться с не самым достойным мужчиной. А, встретившись, в кратчайшие сроки разобраться, кто перед ней и продолжить поиски более приемлемой кандидатуры

Отсюда мораль: «ставить себя» с самого начала. Да, задача не из простых, а кто сказал, что будет легко?

\nА вот эта цитата самая лучшая в книге.\n

Поэтому:\n – Любим, уважаем и ценим себя – уникальную и неповторимую личность.\n – Не позволяем проявлять по отношению к себе неуважения, пренебрежения, а также шутить над тем, что для вас важно и серьезно. Любые попытки пресекаем в корне. Если не получается – пресекаем общение с таким человеком. Он не стоит того, чтобы вы тратили на него свое время и душевные силы. Так же как и любители говорить \"горькую правду\", а на самом деле самоутверждаться за ваш счет.\n – Поймав себя на мысли вроде \"у меня ничего не получился\", \"я некрасивая и неловкая\", \"никто на меня не посмотрит\", выясняем, кто и когда сказал вам эту глупость. Выяснив, изгоняем эту мысль решительно и бесповоротно. Для закрепления результата можно мысленно сказать: \"я самая красивая на свете, у меня все всегда получается. Я – это то, что я есть сейчас. А кто думает иначе, может идти (указывается адрес) и там оставаться\". Произносится с максимальной убежденностью. Еще раз подчеркнем: не \"я буду\", а \"я есть\". Иначе желаемое так и останется в будущем.\n – Для кого придуманы позитивная медитация, шейпинг и прочий фитнес, косметика, ароматические ванны и прочие радости жизни? Правильно – для вас – самой прекраснойиз женщин!\n – И самое главное. Не тратим свою жизнь, чтобы помогать тому, кто не хочет ничего менять в своей жизни или кто привык выезжать за счет других. Для проверки можете предоставить не конечный результат, а средство его достижения. Если он сидит без работы – не устраиваем его к знакомым, а приносим распечатку с вакансиями. А дальше пусть либо начинает действовать, либо отправляется в \"географически неопределенную область\". Не покупаемся на обещания начать новую жизнь \"после дождичка в четверг\".\n – Не стараемся быть идеальной женой даже для человека, не входящего ни в одну из перечисленных категорий. Идеал вызывает, как правило, чувство собственной неполноценности, что ни к чему хорошему не приводит. Либо желание водрузить на постамент, снабдив табличкой \"экспонат руками ре трогать\". Со всеми вытекающими.\n – Очерчиваем границу, где можно поступиться своими интересами, а где – ни в коем случае.\n – Не пытаемся себя переделывать в угоду общественному мнению, родственникам, коллегам, сантехнику дяде Пете. Если вы пришли к выводу, что не созданы для семейной жизни – не стоит выходить замуж только потому, что \"так принято\".\n – Не проявляем нездоровый эгоизм, пытаясь в одиночку переделать все домашние дела. Другие тоже хотят отличиться и проявить себя. Кроме того, привыкнув что за них все делается, ваши домашние могут превратиться в неприспособленных к жизни лентяев. Вы ведь не хотите так поступить со своими близкими, правда?\n – Всем попыткам сделать из вас жертву говорим твердое: \"к черту\". Если считаете нужным пожертвовать собой ради значимой для вас цели – делаете это сознательно и пособственному желанию, а не потому, что за вас так решили.

\n Ну и,конечно, вывод, он же мораль:\n

– Чему вы здесь учите? Что жить надо прежде всего для себя? А кто же тогда будет останавливать на скаку коня и выносить сладко дремлющего мужа из горящей избы? И ктопожертвует своей жизнью, чтобы группа товарищей выбралась, наконец, из леса?\n Кто будет? Тот, кто чувствует к этому призвание и душевную потребность. А не тот, кому внушили, что жить надо так и никак иначе.\n Перефразируя всем известное высказывание, как можно возлюбить ближнего (и дальнего тоже) если не любишь самого себя? И как другие люди почувствуют уважение к человеку, который не считает себя достойным уважения? Вот именно, никак. Опять же со всеми вытекающими

\nРекомендую.Прочесть обязательно!

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Книга напомнила сборник статей из женского журнала. Не всегда приглядная правда заставляет прекрасную половину хорохорится и говорить, что эта книжка не для них. Пусть так. Решить проблему – не решит. Ведь всё зависит от нас самих. И что же делать, если это решение осознанно или нет, не будем выяснять, никак не принимается. Прочитать для профилактики не помешает. Так сказать «постелить соломки»…

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А также помним, что в обществе людей, не пользующихся вашим доверием:

– не говорите о своих планах. Всегда может найтись \"добрая душа\", которая примется отговаривать от задуманного.

– не показываем своих слабых мест. Нечего стыдиться, они есть абсолютно у всех. Кто-то в глубине души считает себя некрасивой, кто-то впадает в ступор при виде дождевого червяка… Опять же, сыщется желающий уколоть именно в \"болевую точку\". Просто для собственного удовольствия.

– не впадаем в панику из-за мелких неприятностей вроде \"поехавшей\" петли на колготках или отлетевшей пуговицы. Как правило, все настолько поглощены собой, что таких пустяков просто не замечают. К тому же, как сказал классик, не бывает унизительных положений, если человек сам себя не унизит. По возможности устраняем неполадки или делаем вид, что все идет как надо.

– если в вашем окружении есть любительницы \"морально опустить\" – сокращаем общение с ними до минимума, а то и отказываемся от него вовсе. Вряд ли может быть что-то хорошее от того, кто предпочитает самоутверждаться за чужой счет. А фразы вроде: \"имей в виду, у тебя на юбке сзади во-о-т такое пятно\" вряд ли можно считать проявлением дружеской заботы.

На случай \"психической атаки\" заготовим несколько фраз-выручалочек, которые должны в нужный момент вылетать сами собой. В такой ситуации промедление с ответом даже на пару секунд приравнивается к проигрышу. Обидчик мило улыбнется и притворится, что он ничего не говорил, а вам только и останется, что чувствовать себя с ног до головы оплеванной. А что после такого захочется? Правильно, уползти внутрь себя и покрепче там закрыться. Авось больше не тронут.

Итак, держим в голове \"не совсем джентльменский набор\" от: \"да ну?\" и \"что вы говорите?\", произнесенных с максимальной степенью презрения, до высказываний на грани откровенной грубости.

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– Ей свойственна, прежде всего, огромная любовь к себе, а эта любовь и привлекает мужчин как огонек свечи ночных мотыльков. Хотя с другой стороны абсолютный эгоизмнехорош, как и всякая крайность

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отправляетесь к подружке или в кино или еще куда-нибудь. Пусть звонит хоть до посинения, в следующий раз подумает, прежде чем заставлять вас ждать. Если вы дали ему номер мобильного, поступаете еще проще – отключаете его (в смысле мобильный) и проводите время по своем усмотрению. Или не отключаете, но на его звонки не реагируете. Не спорю, это потребует значительной силы характера, но зато результат превзойдет все ожидания

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доля здорового пофигизмаНе надо суетиться, заглядывать в глаза, улыбаться изо всех сил и вообще вести себя так, будто это последний и единственный шанс в жизни. Даже если это свидание закончится неудачно – жизнь продолжается, будут и другие. Как сказала одна умная женщина – мужчина как трамвай, один шел, другой непременно придет. Так что ведем себя с достоинством и помним, что если не будете уважать сами себя, бесполезно ждать уважения от других

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Список можно продолжать до бесконечности. Приводит это в итоге к весьма нехорошим вещам. Как сказано в одном детективном боевике, если каждый день уступать по чуть-чуть, то оглянуться не успеете, как все окружающие начнут, образно говоря, вытирать об вас ноги.

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