Читать книгу: «In God's Own Time»

Chapter One

Meg Lawrence almost tripped down the step when she glanced up and saw Kelsey Jamison pull his nine-year-old road-dirt blue car into the far side of the church parking lot. He shut off the motor and remained where he was, eyes to the front, obviously waiting for his children to emerge from the crowded church.

She stood for an instant, letting people stream around her, and ordered her heart to right itself. His profile showed her a familiar straight nose, both sunburned and tanned, and the edge of his mouth—a mouth she most often remembered in laughter—before he dipped his head and his straw cowboy hat hid her view.

Did his green eyes still dance with teasing humor when he told a funny story? Did he, she wondered, still have the knack of turning around an innocent comment someone offered to suit himself, and then laugh gently as if they shared an inside joke?

Those mossy colored eyes had made her feel those moments were ones of personal sharing when she was young; memories she’d held close.

Kelsey hadn’t seen her, and Meg perversely turned on her heel and reentered the church building. It wasn’t that she hadn’t expected to see him sometime or other. After all, their small town and surrounding countryside community left little room for anonymity, and really, she’d counted on seeing him and his children. But she’d planned—she’d hoped—it would be on her own terms, not in the middle of the church parking lot, with scores of onlookers. Five years was a long time not to have seen the man who’d owned her heart since she was fifteen.

And still did seventeen years later.

Meg drew a deep breath and let it go. The last five years had covered so much of life’s rocky bumps, his and her own. The main one being the death of her cousin Dee Dee…his wife.

“Meg Lawrence, you sure are a welcome sight.” Sandy Yoder, one of her mother’s buddies greeted her in the middle of the crowded church hall. “When did you get in? Yesterday, I suppose. I just know your mama was happier’n a June bug to see you. Is she any better?”

Meg hated to be rude, but she heartily wished she had entered the building from the opposite door. She’d already said hello and exchanged news with most of the three hundred or so of the church membership this morning, and Sandy would keep her talking about nothing and everything, making her late home.

“Hi, Sandy. Yes, Mother’s very glad I’m home. Excuse me, but I just want to, um, ask for this morning’s sermon on tape for her.” She moved to edge past her, but a bump from behind shoved her into two teenage girls trying to get through the crush going the opposite way.

“Oh, sorry, honey, I—Lissa?” The young girl stood only a few inches short of her own five foot nine inches, surprising Meg as she glanced into the girl’s face.

“And Aimee.” She confirmed the younger girl’s identity and broke into a broad smile.

Her thoughts scrambled to remember how old they were now.

Yet with one breath, she recalled How could she not, when she’d been around their mother so much during their births and after. Lissa had to be fourteen now and Aimee twelve.

“Hi, Aunt Meg,” Lissa said eagerly. She glanced at Mrs. Yoder for a moment before meeting Meg’s gaze. There was hope and hesitancy in the girl’s green eyes, so like Kelsey’s. “We thought we’d missed you.”

“Yeah, we wanted to see you right away before you—” Aimee, dark-eyed, with her expression eager for adventure like her mother, was effectively cut off by her sister’s elbow. “Um, I mean, before you go back to England. Last time you were home, we got to see you only for a few minutes.”

“Oh, girls…” Meg’s heart warmed immediately even though she felt a tug of guilt for neglecting them so long. She drew them into a hug. Lissa returned the embrace shyly while Aimee’s was unequivocally enthusiastic. “I’m sorry about last time. But we’ll definitely make time together this visit. Days and days of it, if we’re lucky.”

Mrs. Yoder placed a hand on her shoulder with a look of mild reproof at being ignored. “I must go. Happy you’re home, Meg, dear, and I’ll be by to see your mother in a day or so.” The woman added portentously, “She does need you, you know.”

“Yes, Mrs. Yoder,” she answered soberly. “I’ll look forward to seeing you then.”

Meg waited until the older woman had turned away before she grinned at the two young girls. She felt suddenly happy and younger, as though the three of them shared a special understanding. They grinned back. She took their elbows and started for the door. “I hate to pull that old saw on you girls, but—”

“My goodness, how you’ve grown,” Aimee said, laughing, her voice joining Meg’s.

Lissa rolled her eyes as Meg groaned.

“Terrible, isn’t it?” Meg confided with a grimace. “I used to hate it when people said that to me. Especially since I kept growing and growing, both up and out.”

She’d been a large child for her age, and a big girl. The comments about her size hadn’t always been kind, and Meg had had to work hard to cover her sensitive feelings. Even now she filled a size sixteen admirably, but she no longer cared that she wasn’t a sprite. She exercised, ate a balanced diet and accepted herself the way she was.

Meg looked at the two girls, noting Aimee’s slender resemblance to Dee Dee, and the shape of Lissa’s mouth, so much like her father’s.

Nostalgia turned her heart over. She and her cousin Dee Dee had met Kelsey together at a baseball game the summer she turned fifteen and Dee Dee seventeen. Both girls fell hard for the laughing young man who already studied agriculture in a leading state college; they became a threesome that summer. But two years later, Dee Dee was the girl Kelsey had married.

“I guess I haven’t been a very good adopted aunt,” she said with regret. “I haven’t seen you for so long.”

“Oh, but you send us cool Christmas presents every year,” Aimee reminded. “And birthday checks.”

Meg chuckled. True, she’d scoured the shops every December for just the right gifts. She’d loved these little girls of Kelsey’s and her cousin’s, and the boys, too. She’d indeed felt like a favorite aunt before she moved to New York, and then eventually to England. Suddenly, she realized she’d missed them more than she’d thought.

“I’d planned on coming out to see you one day this week,” she assured them.

Aimee jumped on it. “When?”

“As soon as I make sure my mother is truly all right after her heart attack scare. Kathy,” she said, mentioning her sister-in-law, “is sitting with her this morning. Which reminds me. I’d better go.”

As they swung through the door, a young, dark-eyed boy broke from a knot of youngsters milling on the sidewalk, tugging a little girl behind him.

“There you are, Lissa. Where’ve you been?” he demanded, scarcely giving Meg a glance.

Meg stopped, a tiny disappointment running through her. Eleven-year-old Thad hadn’t recognized her.

But then, why should he? He and his brother, Phillip, nine, had been left home with Kelsey when Dee Dee came with the girls to visit her the last time she was home. Dee Dee had invited her out to the farm to see Kelsey and the boys, but her time had been so short, she hadn’t been able to. She hadn’t seen either of the boys for five years. Or their father.

“Thad,” Lissa complained, “I told you I’d be a little late getting out today.”

“Well, I got Heather like you told me. Now take her.” He shoved the child forward. “She’s yammering for you, anyway.”

“Couldn’t you have waited with her over by the spot where Dad usually parks? I just wanted—”

“Dad’s already here.”

“Already?” Lissa scanned the parking lot, spotted the old truck and groaned. “I wanted to talk with Aunt Meg for a little longer.”

“Well, take Heather, will ya? I have ta see Cort before—” He dashed away.

“Thad!” Lissa protested. “Come back here.”

“Dad’ll wait for a little bit,” insisted Aimee. “We don’t have to go just yet.”

“Where’s Phillip?” Lissa wondered out loud as Thad disappeared around a corner.

“Lissa, I’m hungry,” Heather complained, tugging at her sister’s hand.

“In a little while, Heather,” Lissa said. “We have to find Phillip.”

“I’ll go find him,” Aimee offered on a long-suffering note.

“Can we have McDonald’s today?” Heather asked.

“We might if you ask Dad. But don’t count on it,” Aimee said. “We’re s’posed to go to Linda’s house to eat dinner.”

Meg caught a quick look of disgust pass between the two older girls as Aimee took off after Thad.

“Linda?” she asked Lissa.

“You know. Linda Burroughs.”

Ah, yes. Another of the old crowd, another woman who had once vied for Kelsey’s attention. Now widowed, Linda would be a natural choice for another mate, she supposed, from Kelsey’s viewpoint.

Lissa pulled her little sister forward. “Heather, this is Aunt Meg. Say hello.”

Meg dropped to her haunches. Heather was Dee Dee’s last child, with the same gamin face and great dark eyes as Aimee. As Dee Dee.

Heather was only a toddler the last time Meg had seen her…the last time she’d seen Dee Dee.

“Hello, Heather. I’m Meg, your mother’s cousin.”

“I thought you’re an aunt”

“Not really. Your sisters just call me aunt because I’m so much older than they. But I am family, you know, and I’ve known your sisters and brothers ever since they were babies.”

“Did you know me when I was a baby?”

“No, I’m sorry to say.”

“Why not?”

“I’ve been living over in England for a long time.”

“Oh. Why didn’t you come to see me?” The little girl’s gaze was puzzled and a bit plaintive.

Why hadn’t she returned more than once in five years?

She hadn’t come home for the very reason she hadn’t been ready to see Kelsey again three years before and just moments ago. Not even when Dee Dee died.

She’d been so in love with Kelsey that she’d been on the verge of declaring herself; instead she’d chosen to put half a country and an ocean between them rather than to either embarrass Kelsey and Dee Dee or make a fool of herself. She’d taken a new job with a leading New York investment firm, and from there, to England. She’d hoped to get over him with time.

“Well…I’m here now,” she answered the little girl.

“Hello, Meg,” Kelsey’s deep voice interrupted, sending waves of remembered yearning through her, bridging the years as though they were mere minutes.

Time hadn’t been her friend.

Slowly, Meg stood, noting once again that he topped her by several inches even when she wore heels. Staring up at him, she felt the impact of his gaze like a brick had socked her in the middle. Yet she couldn’t help but notice that the gentle, laughing face she remembered had taken on worry lines and those wonderful mossy eyes appeared tired.

He smiled warmly, showing even white teeth. As always, her heart jumped as though ready to turn somersaults.

“Kelsey…” Her mouth went dry. She tried not to gape at him, tried to return the smile, knew it was tremulous. She was thirty-two, and yet this man could still reduce her to a giddy sixteen-year-old.

“Expected you home when I heard your mother was ill.”

“Yes, I came as quickly as possible.”

“How is she?”

“Much better, thank you.”

“She’s home from the hospital, now, isn’t she?”

“Yes.”

Her mind had taken a coffee break, she supposed, because she could think of little more to say. All the sophistication she’d gained over the years dealing with wealthy investment clients, with dating a variety of men, all her business and social poise, waved bye-bye as it winged past his head.

“Daddy, I’m hungry,” Heather said, wedging herself against her father’s legs. “Can we go for hamburgers?”

“We’ll go in a minute, honey. But we’re due at Mrs. Burroughs’s house at one. Lissa, go round up your brothers.”

“Dad…” Lissa protested.

“Lissa,” he responded in a firm voice.

“Okay.” Lissa threw her a pleading look. “Don’t go away before we can make a plan, will you Aunt Meg?”

“No, honey, I promise,” she told the girl, regaining some of her usual easiness. “Perhaps I can take you girls out to lunch one day next week. Even some shopping.”

“Oh, that would be super. I’ll be right back, okay?”

“I’ll stay right here till we have a day fixed.” She turned back to find that Kelsey was studying her face.

“Been a long time.”

“Yes, it has.”

“You didn’t marry that Frenchman, after all.”

“No. Our lives were too…dissimilar.” Her mother had kept the rumor circuit busy, as always, no matter how tenuous. Henri had been history almost before the proposal.

“What about that English fellow your mom was all excited about a few months back?”

His question was asked seriously, but a glint of amusement made his eyes dance. Her nerves settled down; this was the Kelsey she treasured.

“Clive Mmm, yeah.” She chuckled and shrugged, jiggling her keys. “Actually, I still like Clive quite a lot. Mother certainly wouldn’t mind him for a son-in-law at all, but…”

Aimee and Phillip rounded a corner of the rapidly clearing parking lot, noisily arguing with Thad. Lissa trailed behind.

“Why didn’t you come home for Dee Dee’s funeral, Meg?” Kelsey asked out of the blue, snapping her attention back to his face.

His gaze had grown still.

Why? She’d been vacationing in Italy, thinking about marrying Clive when she’d heard of Dee Dee’s death. Being thousands of miles away, she could never have reached home in time for the funeral.

She hadn’t tried, sent condolences and white roses, Dee Dee’s favorites, and simply grieved on her own for the cousin she’d counted more like a sister.

But she’d said no to Clive, too.

Now she swallowed hard against the lump in her throat, offering simply, “I…couldn’t. I’m sorry, Kels. I loved Dee Dee quite a lot, you know.”

His voice deepened with emotion. “Yeah, I know…”

“Can’t we have hamburgers today, Daddy?” Heather begged again as the other children arrived.

“Not today, Heather,” he replied staunchly, finally dropping his gaze. “Maybe next week.”

“Hi, Thad,” Meg greeted. “Hi, Phillip. Remember me?”

Phillip shook his head, looking curiously puzzled from one to the other as Aimee cozied up to her. Thad simply gave her a suspicious stare.

“It’s Aunt Meg,” Lissa told the boys. “Say hello.”

Thad’s frown deepened. Phillip continued to stare.

“Boys,” Kelsey said in an uncompromising tone. “It’s polite to answer when someone says hello.”

“Hi,” Phillip answered directly while Thad dutifully mumbled a greeting “You’re the lady that likes us. Lissa says—”

“We should go, Dad,” Lissa cut in hurriedly. “You know Mrs. Burroughs wants us to be on time.”

“True enough. Okay, elbows and knees, pile in.”

“Da-a-ad,” Lissa protested his teasing description.

Meg fixed it with the girls to pick them up on Thursday for their outing if her mother’s health continued to improve, and with quick goodbyes, turned to go.

Kelsey’s voice stopped her. “Glad you’re home, Meg,” he said softly, his gaze intently speculative. “Missed you.”

“I missed you…all of you…too.” She stumbled through her reply as her stomach turned to jelly.

Had he missed her? Really as much as all that?